Tuesday, December 22, 2009

~true story, funny story~

ahhhhh- vacation!

The first thing I do when I have a moment to myself is go shopping. We are in Southern California. The weather is a balmy 75 degrees and Fashion Island is beckoning to me! I peruse all of the stores I normally do not get to fancy (Bloomingdales, Neiman Marcus, Z Gallerie) and then I see it...my favorite store of all time...Anthropologie!

Do I begin in the kitchen? Oh the accessories are adorable, maybe I should stop there first! That coat is to die for, should I just try it on now? Oh,oh,oh! The sale "room"! Most stores have a sale rack, this store has an entire room!

There it is! I see it! And it is on sale! Regularly$128, now $64. It is a starched silk shirt dress. It is black and white plaid with a full skirt. It has the greatest shape and texture and I am in love!

Checking through the four that they have...small, small, small, ooooh medium! I've lost weight (25 lbs to be exact!) I can wear a medium...easy! Oh no! The zipper is broken and they are selling it "as is". I am petite. This dress is full. I am trying the small!

It goes on easy. Oh My Goodness! It is the dress I have been dreaming of. Cute enough for church with tights and flats, dressy enough for a party with hose and heels. I...am...in...love!

Uh-oh, the zipper will not go up. Now that I mention it, it doesn't fit at all! Okay, okay, okay it is not working out at all. Get it off me quick so that I will not elongate my disappointment! As I pull it up over my head...it is STUCK! er, er, er...move, move, move...it is still STUCK! Okay, I cannot move and the dress is stuck on my arms over my head and I am naked from the neck down (I am wearing my underclothes). Crud! I am starting to not be able to breathe and this dress is permanently STUCK. My arms are starting to go numb over my head and I can't see a thing. I am beginning to panic since I am somewhat claustrophobic!

Just then I hear, "Jenny, how is that dress working out for you?" The salespeople are so nice at my favorite store! They even write your name on a quaint little mirror outside your dressing room so they can be sure to call you by your name. :) I reply, "uh...well...it is too small...and...uh...I am stuck." I hear a little giggle, "Oh, do you need another size?" I am really beginning to get light headed now, partly from my arms above my head NUMB and the lack of oxygen.

"No, actually I just need help getting unstuck."

The look on this sweet young girls face must've been priceless! Of course, I could not see it since I was in a mound of gorgeous black and white plaid prison! With a little yanking and tugging, my size 0 hero helped me to freedom. I have never gotten out of a store so quickly in my life! I wasn't even done browsing! (Don't worry, I did go back!) All the while thinking of the broken zipper on the size medium and wondering if someone else, somewhere got stuck in their dream dress too!

Keep sticking to it because I am not yet a size small!!!

3 comments:

Jennefer said...

That's priceless! I can only imagine what the girl thought of your underclothes!!!

Unknown said...

hilarious! fyi, you need to change your "About Me" section since you are no longer a 10-12!

Liz R. said...

So funny. I love your size zero hero.